“Give time time”, “Give yourself a break”, “Easy does it”, “What you put into it, is what you’ll get out of it”.
My worst day clean is better than my best day in active addiction. The longer I stay in recovery the better living life feels. Sure, not everyday is good day, but I am not waking up in the morning wishing that I had never woken up.
It was tough in the beginning, and I relapsed, but I kept pushin’ on, and life in recovery has been worthwhile since. It’s not the job or the apartment, and it’s not money in the bank. What it is that, in recovery, I became employable again; I was able to move out of an SRO (Single Room Occupancy [supportive housing]) and into my own place of which I pay my own rent; I am no longer spending my last dime chasing the first high; I can stop and smell the flowers; I have feelings; I enjoy being around people; I am not wishing I were dead anymore; I have hope - That is truly a miracle!
These things did not happen overnight, and the universe didn’t just drop it all onto my lap; I had to put in some effort to have these come about. First things first, I have to stay clean. Without recovery I will lose everything and possibly lose my life. I am not perfect; I may fall short at times, but I can now learn from my shortcomings and continue moving forward - one day at a time
